Two nights ago, I practically slipped into a coma of boredom watching the idolettes sing the same fricking songs they sing every movie week. I was barely roused by Adam, even! The less said the better. The only thing I will say about it is that my friend, the Sheriff of Sarcasm, pointed out that Matt should be able to pick better songs, blessed as he is by the third eye in the middle of his forehead! (She also said things about Adam that were too dirty to type.) Quentin Tarentino and his lumpen face were nothing to write home about, but I will be going to see INGLORIOUS BASTARDS...
So on to last night. The show opened with an homage to I.B.! Blow me down! (as Lady C has been known to say...) Okay, so they don't do what Kristi hilariously calls "the great and powerful entrance" (Where the judges all walk down the giant stairs wasting my precious time.) but there is plenty of time wasting ahead!
Oh, speaking of wasting my time, Honest Liz said yesterday, "This is THE MOST POPULAR SHOW on television. They could add an extra half hour and let all the judges speak." Word, Liz... It isn't like they don't add more air to the results shows than you find in a Dairy Queen soft serve. And yet look at me watching the whole thing!
Okay, the kids do MANIAC which is a staple of my youth. It starts "Just a steel town girl on a Saturday night..." which sounds like "Just a Smithtown girl on a Saturday night..." and since I lived in Smithtown in my youth, I felt like the song belonged to me. Lame song, though.
Then the kids go see 17 AGAIN. Honest Liz and I are bringing Wilbur and Joe Mama to see it tonight. We are not at all embarrassed to have a date with 11 year olds. Lil made a crack about Danny Deadwife's age. HAW! And they all pretended that Allison likes Zac Epheron.
Okay, I can't remember if there was anything before Jennifer Hudson. And as much as I love J-Hud as a person, I am fast forwarding this song with the weird syllable thing popular music seems to have nowadays.
I can't wait to see GLEE!
They did some padding with Anoop, but I need to get the kids up in 10 minutes so fast forward I will...
Wow! Simon just told Kris that he was brilliant last night. This is why ALL the judges should be able to give feedback. Seriously, do I care what Randy thinks more than Simon? No frickin' way! Lil is in the bottom three with Noopy. I kind of hope it is her, because I want to hear her sing again. My guess is that if it is anyone other than Anoop, the judges just might just use their free save card. And Anoop is safe! And he has that familiar look on his face that says that he has resigned himself to leaving and is pissed that he has to stay.
And Miley Cyrus is singing. Will I be fast forwarding? Youbetcha... Wow, her teeth are huge and she sings with her nose in a shocking way.
Finally, we learn that Matt is gone. And I have to fast forward through the egregious HAVE YOU EVER REALLY LOVED A WOMAN. Will they let him stay? I am all atwitter! I knew it! They don't love Matt all that much, they just know it will make for good TV. And good news for Matt.
Bad news for America - next week is disco week!
Brunie - OUT!
1 comment:
Obviously the "Third Eye" has magical powers that forced the big save last night. Remember the book that the big bald one gave me about it? There's definitely something to it.
As for Miley Cyrus, did you hear what Jamie Foxx said about her? Something about a gum transplant.
-Sheriff of sarcasm AKA notti
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